The Best & Worst Album Covers of 2009

The record industry sure went through the shitter last year with declining sales and subpar music, so I doubt we’ll see anything different in 2010. However, I’m going to try to stay optimistic. It’s still early in the game and there are 11 more months to go, anything is possible.

Along with a bad year of sales and music, there were a slew of horrendous album covers that filled the bins at Best Buy and Walmart, the only two stores left in America still stocking CD’s. Here are 10 of those covers:

10. Clipse – Til The Casket Drops
Who drew this cover, the same people who draw the Simpsons? I respect Kaws work, but this is lazy.

9. Kiss – Sonic Boom
This takes terrible to a whole new level. Outdated, generic, and corny pretty much sums up this cover. Does Kiss even sign off on these things anymore?

8. Kid Cudi – Man On The Moon: The End of Day
Fam, you got a big ass head. I bet you get headaches “this big”

7. Flo-Rida – Roots
Attention all rappers: You gotta stop with the shirtless torso pictures, it’s played out! Unless you’re promoting homo-eroticism, keep your shirt on… and brush your teeth.

6. KRS-One & Buckshot – Survival Skills
I love these dudes, but they should have went with being in a forest with fatigues and bows and arrows, or being in a forest with a photo-shopped dead deer, or being in a forest around a campfire with marshmellows on sticks. (Get it, survival skills?)

5. Mannie Fresh – Return of the Ballin
Mannie’s return seems like a reminder that he was the mastermind behind Weezy. And that he loved Transformers. And he knows his cars. So don’t you forget it!

4. Joss Stone – Colour Me Free
Umm, I seriously have no words for this

3. Adam Lambert – For Your Entertainment
This cover looks gay. Wait, what? He is gay?? Oh, well nevermind then, it’s perfect!

2. Brooke Hogan – The Redemption
Two words: Prison Art

1. Chris Brown – Graffiti
Chris Breezy had a rough 2009 with all the backlash of backhanding Ri-Ri. His manager could have told him to throw a Big Bird outfit on for the cover and he would have done it, anything to get back to his Wrigley’s winning ways. But with this cover, he looking like he about to swat those cartoons characters after he sprays them with that can of Raid. Stop the violence ya’ll!

I couldn’t run through these bad mamma-jamma’s without giving you what I felt were some of the better covers of 2009. And here we go:

6. Dinosaur Jr. – Farm
I love Dinosaur Jr, and I was hyped about their 2009 release. As usual, they brought a funky artistic cover as well. The green guys look like giant buds and the smokestacks look like bongs with smoke coming out of them. Dope!

5. Yeah Yeah Yeah’s – It’s Blitz
I love the simplicity of this cover. No words, no logos. Just a split second before someone has to clean it up.

4. Animal Collective – Merriweather Post Pavilion
If you’ve sat in front of a computer in the last 12 months, you can appreciate this cover. Proof that the internet is what unites us all.

3. Weezer – Raditude
I’m a sucker for dogs, especially dogs in action!

2. Jay Z – The Blueprint 3
Did ya’ll see that commercial where they reproduced all of Jay’s covers live? That was awesome, and so is this. Jay has become the unofficial mayor of hip hop, and to me this cover represents all the music that he’s created over the years. Very artistic.

1. Susan Boyle – I Dreamed a Dream
You can clown me if you want, but going from a person who’s never been kissed before to looking like she just stepped out of “O” magazine, this cover has gotta win some kind of award, or at least the make up artist does. Good job!

So there you have it, the highs and lows of 2009. If you have any other winners and losers from last year, feel free to let me know!

This entry was posted in Comedy, Hip Hop Stay Losing, Inspiration, Music News and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

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